box

finally friday! even though it's the 13th... spooky. 

i worked on my april layout today, since i got another burst of inspiration. and then i put together a really pretty header (seen below~). what for? i'm not sure yet~ but i'm currently using it as my laptop wallpaper. it's a little tooooooo small, but i think the slight blur sorta ties it all together in a way.

in my weather class today, my prof said that isotopes of an element depend on protons and i almost bit my tongue off because NOOOOOOOOO ㅠㅠ it's electrons............. but i was too terrified to speak in a dead-silent hundred+ person seminar hall, and so i just mentally flopped around about it like a fish. mind fish.

anyway. what are your thoughts on personality types? 

i know i list out my mbti, enneagram, and astrological sun sign here, but i don't really feel that the tests or types themselves hold too much weight. they're a good jumping-off point, and sometimes useful if you want to give people a basic overview of some of your defining personality traits, but they're not everything of course. we contain multitudes, infinity. we can always change. those traits may fit one day, and be completely out of alignment on another. or they can only fit in particular eras of your life, and then never again. and that's okay. 

sometimes, i also feel that these types (esp from quizzes) could read more as confirmation bias than anything else. which... perhaps is somewhat cyclical in reasoning? i'm trying to think about it as, "ah, let me answer these questions and then read the result that is basically just a reflection of those answers in a different format. and then adhere myself completely to it without flexibility and not critically think about it."

that's where the problem is, i think. not really thinking or considering it in context with yourself, rather than it being the context and you forcing yourself into it. or not. or constantly taking those sorts of quizzes over and over again, trying to find something you can fit into, but it's not working, and it's like dude!!! you literally don't have to!!! the human condition cannot be defined by four letters or two numbers out of nine, or ANYTHING!!!! sit with yourself, try to synthesize everything you can find out about yourself rather than try to view yourself through the lens of a TEST.

i understand our desire to find some sort of belonging and/or simple ways to define ourselves and know ourselves, but when we attribute too much weight to these quizzes and types, it can get problematic. and they're so easy for bad actors to take advantage of.

that's just my view on it, though.

i digress a bit, but being 9 and finding out every site described scorpios as vengeful and cunning while everyone else was passionate or fun or sweet was so... :( like thanks, i guess. glad to know that's who i really am...? but then i shrugged it off in two hours LOLZ.

that being said. small personality quizzes are always lots of fun! (it would be strange of me to not mention them at all in this rant, since i take so many of them and make them occasionally.) i would love to know how my fashion choices can be used to assign myself to a dessert. but! it doesn't really mean anything, and everyone knows that, and thank cod there's no pressure around it.

sotd: tenjo no melody by tenjochiki (YOU GUYS HAVE TO LISTEN TO THIS PLEASEEEEE)